After two months of not doing well on my goals, I decided at the beginning of April to get back on the horse and try again. Overall it went really well. I met almost all of the goals, and am rewarding myself with a massage this week!
Goal I didn't meet- getting to the temple, however, I did have plans to go and they fell through at the last minute so I decided to give myself points for good intentions (I know the path to Hell is paved with good intentions.... but I did do some other good and spiritually uplifting things this month so stop judging me- I'm counting it :)
Reflecting on why February and March did not go well:
It is a really simple and stupid thing, but to start out with, I am using a dry-erase calendar to track myself daily. I didn't erase January and put up February right away so I wasn't tracking myself physically, this led to forgetting and subsequent cheating on the goals. I also didn't pick a reward to start of the month so I wasn't working towards anything in particular, this led to lack of motivation to keep going. Then we all took turns getting sick, really sick which meant my goals were about the last thing on my mind.
Moving into March, on top of being a mom and working full time, I had to add an online course and multiple doctor's appointments on top of an already crazy schedule. Time is my enemy. I straight up didn't have enough time to get out and exercise or think about making my goals a priority.
So that brings us up to April. My class finished up the last week of March, we were all back in good health, I got my calendar started at the beginning of the month, and gave myself a reward to work towards, and it rocked. In fact, I got out and did some sort of exercise EVERY DAY last week!
Thoughts about time:
So if you look up a few lines I said that time is my enemy. A bold statement, that I thought about changing or taking out, but instead I decided to wax philosophical on it. I feel like Time is a tricky thing because there are so many things competing for it. So maybe it's not time that is my enemy but the number of activities going on. Of course the answer to that dilemma is to prioritize, but this is where I struggle at times because with each priority there comes an opportunity cost. Everything I choose to spend time on takes away from the amount of time I could be spending doing something else, and in order to be perfect at everything I would like to put time and energy into there wouldn't be enough time. So the answer to the time dilemma (priorities) creates new dilemmas- how to prioritize.
Work takes out 8 hours from my day- opportunities it allows for:
Supporting my family
Personal enrichment
Socialization
Stretching my brain/ using some of my talents
Recognition of achievements and efforts
Costs:
Not able to spend that time with Jason
Paying for child care
Not able to use that time for household needs (cooking, cleaning, shopping etc)
A whole lot of sitting- not exercising
Socializing with non work friends
Work ends at 4, and I must say, something I feel like I have done really well on is creating a work/life balance. I very rarely work after 4. However, sometimes I struggle with how to prioritize the rest of that time. I typically start putting Jason down around 9, which gives me 5 hours to prioritize the following:
Playing/ spending time with the Baby
Spending time with husband
Cooking dinner
Cleaning
Exercising
Relaxing
Socializing
There are a lot of other things that could be added to the list, but these are the biggies. I do try to combine items, walking with friends takes care of exercise and socializing- but it means less time to cook dinner. Making a menu and planning ahead has helped a lot with the dinner prep- but cleaning up afterward means taking away time to spend with the baby when I've already spent the whole day away from him. However, not doing the dishes/ other cleaning makes for a messy house and attracts bugs which is gross. And then sometimes I feel like if I don't just sit down and relax I might go crazy. So the fight for priorities ensues and time feels like my enemy.
On the flip side- drum roll.... I am quitting my job at the end of the school year! Yay! Tim is graduating and has a great job lined up which allows me to stop working. I am super excited- and this takes out the 8 hour chunk devoted to work which leaves everything else competing for time in the evening. While I am super excited and keep making plans of what I will do with my new found time- sometimes when I think about it time sounds like an enemy again. I am not accustomed to having down time. While the battle for priorities is difficult, there is something easy about not having to choose what to do with the largest chunk of my day- I just know that I'm working. Unstructured time kind of scares me. So I think my next time battle will be figuring out how to fill all the extra time. I'm sure I'll figure it out- stay tuned for the adventure!
Tuesday, May 5, 2015
Monday, February 2, 2015
Week 4- I made it!
Week 4- Sufficeth to say I met my goals this week.
Overall for the month I met each goal each week with the exception of my dessert goal one week. However, as you may remember I needed to meet the goal 3/4 weeks to get my reward.
So, hopefully this weekend I will go shopping! Anyone wanna come????? I'll let you hold my baby :)
Sorry no big insights this week. Last week took all the insight out of me. I'm also terribly tired right now as my neighbors opted to have a drunken party last night after the Super Bowl and I woke up at 2:30 in the morning to a guy singing "I need you baby!!!!" Close to 3:00 I called security and they quieted down, but unfortunately I was very much awake by then and didn't go back to sleep until 4:30.
So I guess my parting thought would be to consider how your actions impact those around you. No man is an island! And apartment walls are very thin.
Overall for the month I met each goal each week with the exception of my dessert goal one week. However, as you may remember I needed to meet the goal 3/4 weeks to get my reward.
So, hopefully this weekend I will go shopping! Anyone wanna come????? I'll let you hold my baby :)
Sorry no big insights this week. Last week took all the insight out of me. I'm also terribly tired right now as my neighbors opted to have a drunken party last night after the Super Bowl and I woke up at 2:30 in the morning to a guy singing "I need you baby!!!!" Close to 3:00 I called security and they quieted down, but unfortunately I was very much awake by then and didn't go back to sleep until 4:30.
So I guess my parting thought would be to consider how your actions impact those around you. No man is an island! And apartment walls are very thin.
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Week 2 & 3- Gathering some random insights- Acceptance
I waited too long last Sunday to post, and then ran out of time so here's my update for two weeks:
Week 2:
Health:
Exercise- 4 times
Dessert- 2 times
Spiritual:
Scriptures- 6 times
Temple- check!
Personal:
Facebook- average <45 minutes
Journal- check!
Week 3:
Health:
Exercise- 4 times (a little loosey goosey on considering walking a friend's dog + walking Costco and carrying potatoes and lifting large boxes as exercise for Saturday)
Dessert- I don't want to talk about it
Spiritual:
Scriptures- 6 times
Temple- see last week :)
Personal:
Facebook- average <45 minutes
Journal- check!
Have you seen that video about men's brains versus women's brains that compares a woman's brain to a ball of wire and everything is interconnected? I'm kind of feeling that way right now. I've got several thoughts running around in my brain and they are all interconnected but not in a way that I can easily type out in an understandable fashion. Warning this might be more stream of conscious than any of my other posts. For those that have had a conversation with me where I start putting information together you can picture that if I was talking my arms would be waving all over the place. I think I wave my arms around because I am trying to untangle the ball of wire. Earlier today my wonderful Aunt Jenny referred to it as a monkey swinging through the branches of her brain. Yep, that pretty much describes things perfectly. (Side note- between typing this and posting I was talking to my husband and waving my hands around and he said it was like I was trying to unravel string- I was like, that is exactly what I'm trying to do!)
Last week we got to the temple. The day we planned happened to coincide with the North Star Community temple day however, we did not attend at their arranged time for a variety of reasons (9:00 is hard to get up, get a baby fed, and out the door, but biggest problem being my temple dress doesn't fit and the Gilbert Temple doesn't rent clothes so gaining weight is preventing me from participating in activities like I wish I could). But no matter what, it's always good to go to the temple whenever and wherever. I was thinking a lot about the North Star Community in connection with other LDS groups and movements that have formed recently. A phrase stuck out to me- within the bounds that Lord has set. I think this is why I appreciate this group. The group is established to support those with same gender attraction and their loved ones. The point of their temple weekend was to pray for those within the community but also to pray for the leadership of the church so that further revelation, understanding, and acceptance may be found. There is no pushing for a specific agenda (which would be outside the bounds the Lord has set), just that more revelation will come and that hearts will be open. The attitude is very humble and respectful, and I appreciate that. (Note, coming back to this several days later- I wrote this prior to the Church's press conference on LGBT and Religious rights having no idea that the press conference was coming- definite answer to prayers.)
This leads me to my next line of thought that has been circling around in my head- sometimes peacefully and sometimes not so much. The issue behind the too small temple dress. I have never been a skinny person and by never I mean in third grade a friend made a comment about how big my thighs were an in 4th grade one day we were told that we would not go out to recess until we all had an assignment done, we were all done and the teacher still wasn't letting us out- a boy stood up and shouted, "We're not going out until the fat lady sings! Stephanie, stand up and sing!" The teacher chided the boy by saying that that was something between a student and their parents and not ok for him to tease about, but definitely didn't say anything about me not being fat. I have always wanted to be a skinny person. I will probably never be a skinny person.
My temple dress stopped fitting before I got pregnant, then I got pregnant, now I'm not pregnant but still weigh significantly more than I did pre-pregnancy when I had already gained weight. Gaining a substantial amount of weight is uncomfortable. It's physically uncomfortable- I can feel it all the time. It's emotionally uncomfortable- I see pictures and go, whoa, that's not good. It's socially uncomfortable- sorry I can't go to the Gilbert temple because they don't rent clothes, just renting a dress is uncomfortable because while I hope the sweet little laundry lady isn't judging me and someone could rent a dress for a number of reasons, I know why I'm having to rent a dress. There's really no way to escape the reminders that I have put on more than a little weight.
But it shouldn't matter right? Physical appearance doesn't matter right? Everyone should just accept me as I am and I just need to love myself as I am. Big is beautiful. I saw a recent article about the "Fat Acceptance Movement." I'm not going to get into it very much, but if you're interested in looking at it, it adds a little more background to my thoughts and insights.
I don't like yes or no questions, because I feel like very rarely is there a straight up yes or no answer to something. I don't think of things so much black and white- more like 50 shades of gray, but not like the book because I hear it's pretty raunchy, but I digress.
While sitting in the temple and during other "pondersome" (is that a word- ponderous, ponderosa- no that's a pine tree- whatever you get the point) moments I have gotten some answers.
No, it doesn't matter. God loves me no matter what, he doesn't care that I had to rent a big white Angel mumu to worship him in the temple. He'd love me even if I wasn't at the temple. But, he does love that I went to the temple. And everyone should love me and respect me no matter what. And I need to love myself no matter what. However, because God loves me, and others love me, and I love me, they do and should care that I am healthy in mind, body, and spirit. Taking care of my physical is part of that, so it matters that I like what I look like in the mirror and in pictures, and it matters that my clothes don't fit, and it matters that I have the energy to keep up with a 7 month old. The thing I need to change is my focus. I need to stop caring because I'm worried I look ugly or people are judging me. I need to make changes so that I can be a better me in all aspects of life. But I also need to accept myself where I am at right now. A thought that I have had about "Fat acceptance" and political acceptance, and lifestyle acceptance, etc. etc. etc, is that acceptance and agreement are not the same thing. Acceptance means that you respect and do not seek to tear down someone, but does not mean that you agree with their actions or motives. You should accept and love me as a person, but that doesn't mean you agree with me eating ice cream and not exercising.
A good friend posted on her blog recently about "being happy when..." Her happy place she thought was when she is able to move to a new location with a big yard etc. I hope someday she gets her nice house in a cooler climate with her big yard, and I'm sure it will add to her happiness. However, her point was that she needed to be happy now in her little apartment with her adorable daughter, and to accept that (now I'm putting some words in her mouth) she won't find a fullness of joy in this life because this world and this life by nature are flawed. For 7 months now I have been saying that I will do this or do that when I lose the baby weight, especially buying new clothes. So, for 7 months now I have had 1 pair of pants, a skirt, and 1 pair of capris and my maternity shirts to choose from for weekday wear. Mostly since I work at home I just wear exercise clothing and then get depressed when I do need to leave the house because I literally have nothing to wear. My next step in accepting myself where I am is that I am going to go and buy myself some new clothes. I'm not going to care what size they are. But I'm also not going to stop moving forward and doing my best to live a healthier lifestyle.
Another friend shared some wonderful and touching thoughts with me about focusing on "building the kingdom." That triggered a lot of thoughts about a lot of things (do I think too much- possibly) some of which I will share in later blogs, because let's be honest, this is getting pretty long and losing logical flow and that would just push us over the top. But I was thinking about how my goals help with focusing on building the kingdom. Now the spiritual goals are pretty obvious, going to the temple helps with work for the dead, reading scriptures builds my testimony and gospel knowledge which helps me help others. Personal goals aren't hard to show the connection either- writing in my journal can help future generations, spending less time idly on Facebook means I have more time to dedicate to more productive pursuits. So how do health goals translate to building the kingdom? This same friend that shared about building the kingdom previously shared an experience when she was helping others so much that she was not really taking time for herself. She was told by a leader, "You can't serve from an empty plate." When we take better care of ourselves we can be more effective at taking care of others. That doesn't mean that being unhealthy means you are ineffective, but perhaps not as effective as you can be.
Now are we ever going to be "as effective as we can be." No, because that would mean perfection and the fullness of joy mentioned previously. However, the point of all of this is, that we need to be constantly striving to do better. To accept and love where we and others are, but always move forward.
Week 2:
Health:
Exercise- 4 times
Dessert- 2 times
Spiritual:
Scriptures- 6 times
Temple- check!
Personal:
Facebook- average <45 minutes
Journal- check!
Week 3:
Health:
Exercise- 4 times (a little loosey goosey on considering walking a friend's dog + walking Costco and carrying potatoes and lifting large boxes as exercise for Saturday)
Dessert- I don't want to talk about it
Spiritual:
Scriptures- 6 times
Temple- see last week :)
Personal:
Facebook- average <45 minutes
Journal- check!
Have you seen that video about men's brains versus women's brains that compares a woman's brain to a ball of wire and everything is interconnected? I'm kind of feeling that way right now. I've got several thoughts running around in my brain and they are all interconnected but not in a way that I can easily type out in an understandable fashion. Warning this might be more stream of conscious than any of my other posts. For those that have had a conversation with me where I start putting information together you can picture that if I was talking my arms would be waving all over the place. I think I wave my arms around because I am trying to untangle the ball of wire. Earlier today my wonderful Aunt Jenny referred to it as a monkey swinging through the branches of her brain. Yep, that pretty much describes things perfectly. (Side note- between typing this and posting I was talking to my husband and waving my hands around and he said it was like I was trying to unravel string- I was like, that is exactly what I'm trying to do!)
Last week we got to the temple. The day we planned happened to coincide with the North Star Community temple day however, we did not attend at their arranged time for a variety of reasons (9:00 is hard to get up, get a baby fed, and out the door, but biggest problem being my temple dress doesn't fit and the Gilbert Temple doesn't rent clothes so gaining weight is preventing me from participating in activities like I wish I could). But no matter what, it's always good to go to the temple whenever and wherever. I was thinking a lot about the North Star Community in connection with other LDS groups and movements that have formed recently. A phrase stuck out to me- within the bounds that Lord has set. I think this is why I appreciate this group. The group is established to support those with same gender attraction and their loved ones. The point of their temple weekend was to pray for those within the community but also to pray for the leadership of the church so that further revelation, understanding, and acceptance may be found. There is no pushing for a specific agenda (which would be outside the bounds the Lord has set), just that more revelation will come and that hearts will be open. The attitude is very humble and respectful, and I appreciate that. (Note, coming back to this several days later- I wrote this prior to the Church's press conference on LGBT and Religious rights having no idea that the press conference was coming- definite answer to prayers.)
This leads me to my next line of thought that has been circling around in my head- sometimes peacefully and sometimes not so much. The issue behind the too small temple dress. I have never been a skinny person and by never I mean in third grade a friend made a comment about how big my thighs were an in 4th grade one day we were told that we would not go out to recess until we all had an assignment done, we were all done and the teacher still wasn't letting us out- a boy stood up and shouted, "We're not going out until the fat lady sings! Stephanie, stand up and sing!" The teacher chided the boy by saying that that was something between a student and their parents and not ok for him to tease about, but definitely didn't say anything about me not being fat. I have always wanted to be a skinny person. I will probably never be a skinny person.
My temple dress stopped fitting before I got pregnant, then I got pregnant, now I'm not pregnant but still weigh significantly more than I did pre-pregnancy when I had already gained weight. Gaining a substantial amount of weight is uncomfortable. It's physically uncomfortable- I can feel it all the time. It's emotionally uncomfortable- I see pictures and go, whoa, that's not good. It's socially uncomfortable- sorry I can't go to the Gilbert temple because they don't rent clothes, just renting a dress is uncomfortable because while I hope the sweet little laundry lady isn't judging me and someone could rent a dress for a number of reasons, I know why I'm having to rent a dress. There's really no way to escape the reminders that I have put on more than a little weight.
But it shouldn't matter right? Physical appearance doesn't matter right? Everyone should just accept me as I am and I just need to love myself as I am. Big is beautiful. I saw a recent article about the "Fat Acceptance Movement." I'm not going to get into it very much, but if you're interested in looking at it, it adds a little more background to my thoughts and insights.
I don't like yes or no questions, because I feel like very rarely is there a straight up yes or no answer to something. I don't think of things so much black and white- more like 50 shades of gray, but not like the book because I hear it's pretty raunchy, but I digress.
While sitting in the temple and during other "pondersome" (is that a word- ponderous, ponderosa- no that's a pine tree- whatever you get the point) moments I have gotten some answers.
No, it doesn't matter. God loves me no matter what, he doesn't care that I had to rent a big white Angel mumu to worship him in the temple. He'd love me even if I wasn't at the temple. But, he does love that I went to the temple. And everyone should love me and respect me no matter what. And I need to love myself no matter what. However, because God loves me, and others love me, and I love me, they do and should care that I am healthy in mind, body, and spirit. Taking care of my physical is part of that, so it matters that I like what I look like in the mirror and in pictures, and it matters that my clothes don't fit, and it matters that I have the energy to keep up with a 7 month old. The thing I need to change is my focus. I need to stop caring because I'm worried I look ugly or people are judging me. I need to make changes so that I can be a better me in all aspects of life. But I also need to accept myself where I am at right now. A thought that I have had about "Fat acceptance" and political acceptance, and lifestyle acceptance, etc. etc. etc, is that acceptance and agreement are not the same thing. Acceptance means that you respect and do not seek to tear down someone, but does not mean that you agree with their actions or motives. You should accept and love me as a person, but that doesn't mean you agree with me eating ice cream and not exercising.
A good friend posted on her blog recently about "being happy when..." Her happy place she thought was when she is able to move to a new location with a big yard etc. I hope someday she gets her nice house in a cooler climate with her big yard, and I'm sure it will add to her happiness. However, her point was that she needed to be happy now in her little apartment with her adorable daughter, and to accept that (now I'm putting some words in her mouth) she won't find a fullness of joy in this life because this world and this life by nature are flawed. For 7 months now I have been saying that I will do this or do that when I lose the baby weight, especially buying new clothes. So, for 7 months now I have had 1 pair of pants, a skirt, and 1 pair of capris and my maternity shirts to choose from for weekday wear. Mostly since I work at home I just wear exercise clothing and then get depressed when I do need to leave the house because I literally have nothing to wear. My next step in accepting myself where I am is that I am going to go and buy myself some new clothes. I'm not going to care what size they are. But I'm also not going to stop moving forward and doing my best to live a healthier lifestyle.
Another friend shared some wonderful and touching thoughts with me about focusing on "building the kingdom." That triggered a lot of thoughts about a lot of things (do I think too much- possibly) some of which I will share in later blogs, because let's be honest, this is getting pretty long and losing logical flow and that would just push us over the top. But I was thinking about how my goals help with focusing on building the kingdom. Now the spiritual goals are pretty obvious, going to the temple helps with work for the dead, reading scriptures builds my testimony and gospel knowledge which helps me help others. Personal goals aren't hard to show the connection either- writing in my journal can help future generations, spending less time idly on Facebook means I have more time to dedicate to more productive pursuits. So how do health goals translate to building the kingdom? This same friend that shared about building the kingdom previously shared an experience when she was helping others so much that she was not really taking time for herself. She was told by a leader, "You can't serve from an empty plate." When we take better care of ourselves we can be more effective at taking care of others. That doesn't mean that being unhealthy means you are ineffective, but perhaps not as effective as you can be.
Now are we ever going to be "as effective as we can be." No, because that would mean perfection and the fullness of joy mentioned previously. However, the point of all of this is, that we need to be constantly striving to do better. To accept and love where we and others are, but always move forward.
Sunday, January 11, 2015
Progress Monitoring Week 1
First week progress:
Exercise- 4x -I cheated a little and counted that I exercised twice on Thursday, but doctor's appointments and song practices ate up some of my normal exercise time
Dessert- 2x- This was difficult, I normally go out to dinner with my parents on Fridays but we normally DO NOT get dessert at the restaurant. I had some dessert on Monday night then on Thursday I decided to splurge and get some Fro-yo. Well then Friday we went to Village Inn and the group decided to try out some pie, but I resisted the temptation!
Scriptures- 6x- We've been reading from the new Ezra Taft Benson manual. It's been really great!
Temple- not yet, hardship came up as the Mesa temple is closing so we will need to go to Gilbert or Phoenix which is fine, except they don't rent clothes and my dress doesn't fit and I haven't ordered my new one for Christmas yet.... but this hardship will be overcome
Facebook- averaged 35 minutes per day, feeling great about my internet/ leisure time choices
Journal- going to go do that right now! Promise!
Exercise- 4x -I cheated a little and counted that I exercised twice on Thursday, but doctor's appointments and song practices ate up some of my normal exercise time
Dessert- 2x- This was difficult, I normally go out to dinner with my parents on Fridays but we normally DO NOT get dessert at the restaurant. I had some dessert on Monday night then on Thursday I decided to splurge and get some Fro-yo. Well then Friday we went to Village Inn and the group decided to try out some pie, but I resisted the temptation!
Scriptures- 6x- We've been reading from the new Ezra Taft Benson manual. It's been really great!
Temple- not yet, hardship came up as the Mesa temple is closing so we will need to go to Gilbert or Phoenix which is fine, except they don't rent clothes and my dress doesn't fit and I haven't ordered my new one for Christmas yet.... but this hardship will be overcome
Facebook- averaged 35 minutes per day, feeling great about my internet/ leisure time choices
Journal- going to go do that right now! Promise!
Thursday, January 1, 2015
Present Levels and Goals
The meat of an IEP is the Present Levels of Performance which which explains where the individual is at right now in different areas- typically we look at academic performance, basic functional skills, communication, etc. Based on where they are at right now, we identify an area that needs work and develop a goal to address the needs. Ideally goals are also linked to state standards. However, state standards are broad and are not necessarily written in a way that is observable and measurable. The standard is what you are looking up to and hoping to attain, the goal is something specific that tells how you are getting there, or how you are going to measure that you are there.
So back to that side conversation from Relief Society about developing attributes. It's great to say that you want to be more charitable, more faithful, more virtuous, but how on earth do you measure that? The attributes are like the state standards, but if you want to measure your progress on it you need to think about what it looks like when you have that attribute and find something to measure. (James 2:17-18 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone. Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works.) A great place to start to find measurable ways to track attributes is the Preach My Gospel attributes activity. However, I would break some of those down more to make them more measurable. Perhaps that will be the subject of a future blog post. However, you could make the goal to increase your score in a certain area and use the activity as your measurement tool. It's not a perfect science. And at the end of the day it's not going to matter so much what score you gave yourself but when you stand before God at judgment to be able to say that you tried your best.
I have chosen to focus my goals on the following "Personal Standards" areas (as opposed to state standards): Health, Spirituality, Personal Fulfillment. So without much further ado.....my Present Levels:
Health:
I am currently not as healthy as I would like to be. I am significantly overweight and lack the energy I desire to be able to accomplish everything I would like to do. I struggle with back and knee pain most likely due to a combination of being overweight and lacking the strength to adequately lift and carry an 18 lb baby (then try adding on a 10 lb car seat). I recently participated in a biggest lost challenge but did not see results anywhere near what I was wanting. I initially attempted to cut out all sweets altogether, however, I was not losing very much weight compared to how hard I was trying and then on a day when I was stuck in the office without access to health food I gained back all of the weight I had lost in two weeks in one day. The lack of loss and the ease of gaining was very discouraging which made it difficult to want to keep trying especially upon realizing there was no chance of winning a prize. Another problem with the challenge was that my success at the goal was not necessarily measurable as it depended upon other people failing. I can not qualify my suspicions with scientific data, however, based on these struggles, other symptoms, and family history, I believe there may be some underlying issues that are inhibiting me from losing weight. I have realized that a better goal for me at this time would not be centered around actual pounds lost (however I will still track that) but would be better to focus on what is in my immediate control.
I currently exercise on average 3 times per week for at least 20 minutes, sometimes up to an hour. This includes walking with friends while pushing the baby in the stroller, Zumba, Elipticising (the word I invented for what you do on an eliptical- it's not walking, running, or riding), or other work out videos. Getting up to 4 times a week will be a challenge without being too big of a step to reach.
As mentioned previously I attempted to remove all desserts from my diet- I failed. I also had hoped to track calories, however, I realized this was very time consuming when not eating processed foods that are already banked in a database for tracking. I did put a few recipes in the My Fitness Pal app, but it was taking too much time so I did not continue it. If someone has any great ideas for calorie tracking that does not take a ton of time I would be open to this type of goal in the future, but for now, it's not something I can commit to. I also LOVE dessert too much to give it up. It was really depressing to be making myself so miserable with not allowing myself desserts and not seeing any results. However, I do need to limit myself more than I do currently. I have fallen back into some old habits and eat dessert whenever it is readily available. I am pretty good about not buying myself desserts. Dessert includes but is not limited too- ice cream, brownies, cookies, donuts, cakes, pies, cinnamon rolls, etc. In order to fulfill sweet cravings items that will be allowed include- cottage cheese with fruit, homemade fruit sorbet, etc.
Health goals:
Given at least a 20 minutes exercise period, Stephanie will participate in an exercise activity at least 4 days in a week for at least 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
When presented with opportunities to eat dessert, Stephanie will eat dessert no more than 2 times a week for at least 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Spiritual Present Levels:
Somethings I feel I am doing pretty well with currently- fulfilling my calling, attending church, participating in lessons, caring for others. There's always a million things that I want to work on Spiritually, but you just can't tackle everything at once. That sets up for failure. So two areas that I am feeling bad have been lacking recently. Gospel study- averaging about 4 times per week. Gospel study could include- anything from the scriptures, conference talks, or lesson manuals. Temple attendance- I think we went in Sept? Oct? It hasn't been good since being pregnant, growing out of my dress, then having a baby so you can't just go it has to be planned well in advance, oh and my dress still doesn't fit- but getting a new one with Christmas money.
Spiritual Goals:
As part of the daily routine, Stephanie will participate in gospel study at least 6 days per week for at least 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Upon planning out the month, Stephanie will attend the temple at least once per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Personal Fulfillment:
Having a full time job is difficult. Being a full time mom is difficult. For some crazy reason I do both, at the same time. Sometimes between the working and the taking care of the baby and pretending like I cook and do dishes it's hard to make sure that I take time to do things for myself. Currently I am looking around at the insanely messy apartment and just letting it go so I can finish this blog post because I intended to have it finished yesterday. I was going to make goals about having dishes done or keeping the house clean but decided that I need to focus on making sure I am taking care of myself first, and then I'll probably have more time and energy to take care of the house anyway. In my exhaustion at the end of the day, when I do have some free time, especially while I'm nursing the baby, I turn to the easiest thing to do- Facebook. Now let me make it clear that I am not anti-Facebook, clearly as you most likely found the link to my blog on Facebook. Facebook can be fun, enlightening, and relaxing. However, extended time on Facebook tends to become boring, idle, and frequently aggravating. Later I think about things I wish I had done but didn't because I got sucked into the never ending hole that is Facebook. I currently spend over an hour a day scrolling through the newsfeed. I am going to separate out reading news articles, blogs, etc that Facebook leads me to. I'm also really bad at writing in a journal. Perhaps future generations will read our Facebook posts as our journals??? But I don't post a lot of personal thoughts on Facebook for various reasons- it's not something I want to share with the world at large, or I'm worried about what type of debates it might start in the comments. My little brother bought me a beautiful planner/ journal combo for Christmas that has weekly prompts to guide journal writing. It would be very tragic if it did not get used.
Personal Goals:
Given options for down time, Stephanie will average no more than 45 minutes per day on Facebook over the course of a week for 3/4 weeks a month as tracked by a Facebook log sheet in Excel over a 3 month period with data transferred to the goal calendar weekly.
Given her planner/ journal combo, Stephanie will journal at least weekly for 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Reward Schedule!
Typically a reward schedule isn't necessarily set out in an IEP, but it is an important principal that there are rewards for correct responses and good behavior. Positive reinforcement! We do the things we do because we get something we want from it. I.E.- I eat too much dessert because I get the instant gratification of the flavor and texture of the food. I Facebook because it lets my brain stop working for a while. A student might throw a tantrum because it gets them out of work or gives them access to something they want. The reward needs to be motivating enough to get passed the "natural man" rewards of what you are doing right now. So I am going to be setting myself a nice reward each month if I meet my goals. This month's reward will be a shopping trip with my Christmas gift cards.
I'll be checking in weekly to see how I am doing with my goals. At the end of the month I will determine if my goals were met and if I get my reward then set a new reward for the next month. At the end of the 3 months I will determine if the goals have been mastered and write new goals, continue goals, or tweak the goals.
So back to that side conversation from Relief Society about developing attributes. It's great to say that you want to be more charitable, more faithful, more virtuous, but how on earth do you measure that? The attributes are like the state standards, but if you want to measure your progress on it you need to think about what it looks like when you have that attribute and find something to measure. (James 2:17-18 Even so faith, if it hath not works, is dead, being alone. Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works.) A great place to start to find measurable ways to track attributes is the Preach My Gospel attributes activity. However, I would break some of those down more to make them more measurable. Perhaps that will be the subject of a future blog post. However, you could make the goal to increase your score in a certain area and use the activity as your measurement tool. It's not a perfect science. And at the end of the day it's not going to matter so much what score you gave yourself but when you stand before God at judgment to be able to say that you tried your best.
I have chosen to focus my goals on the following "Personal Standards" areas (as opposed to state standards): Health, Spirituality, Personal Fulfillment. So without much further ado.....my Present Levels:
Health:
I am currently not as healthy as I would like to be. I am significantly overweight and lack the energy I desire to be able to accomplish everything I would like to do. I struggle with back and knee pain most likely due to a combination of being overweight and lacking the strength to adequately lift and carry an 18 lb baby (then try adding on a 10 lb car seat). I recently participated in a biggest lost challenge but did not see results anywhere near what I was wanting. I initially attempted to cut out all sweets altogether, however, I was not losing very much weight compared to how hard I was trying and then on a day when I was stuck in the office without access to health food I gained back all of the weight I had lost in two weeks in one day. The lack of loss and the ease of gaining was very discouraging which made it difficult to want to keep trying especially upon realizing there was no chance of winning a prize. Another problem with the challenge was that my success at the goal was not necessarily measurable as it depended upon other people failing. I can not qualify my suspicions with scientific data, however, based on these struggles, other symptoms, and family history, I believe there may be some underlying issues that are inhibiting me from losing weight. I have realized that a better goal for me at this time would not be centered around actual pounds lost (however I will still track that) but would be better to focus on what is in my immediate control.
I currently exercise on average 3 times per week for at least 20 minutes, sometimes up to an hour. This includes walking with friends while pushing the baby in the stroller, Zumba, Elipticising (the word I invented for what you do on an eliptical- it's not walking, running, or riding), or other work out videos. Getting up to 4 times a week will be a challenge without being too big of a step to reach.
As mentioned previously I attempted to remove all desserts from my diet- I failed. I also had hoped to track calories, however, I realized this was very time consuming when not eating processed foods that are already banked in a database for tracking. I did put a few recipes in the My Fitness Pal app, but it was taking too much time so I did not continue it. If someone has any great ideas for calorie tracking that does not take a ton of time I would be open to this type of goal in the future, but for now, it's not something I can commit to. I also LOVE dessert too much to give it up. It was really depressing to be making myself so miserable with not allowing myself desserts and not seeing any results. However, I do need to limit myself more than I do currently. I have fallen back into some old habits and eat dessert whenever it is readily available. I am pretty good about not buying myself desserts. Dessert includes but is not limited too- ice cream, brownies, cookies, donuts, cakes, pies, cinnamon rolls, etc. In order to fulfill sweet cravings items that will be allowed include- cottage cheese with fruit, homemade fruit sorbet, etc.
Health goals:
Given at least a 20 minutes exercise period, Stephanie will participate in an exercise activity at least 4 days in a week for at least 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
When presented with opportunities to eat dessert, Stephanie will eat dessert no more than 2 times a week for at least 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Spiritual Present Levels:
Somethings I feel I am doing pretty well with currently- fulfilling my calling, attending church, participating in lessons, caring for others. There's always a million things that I want to work on Spiritually, but you just can't tackle everything at once. That sets up for failure. So two areas that I am feeling bad have been lacking recently. Gospel study- averaging about 4 times per week. Gospel study could include- anything from the scriptures, conference talks, or lesson manuals. Temple attendance- I think we went in Sept? Oct? It hasn't been good since being pregnant, growing out of my dress, then having a baby so you can't just go it has to be planned well in advance, oh and my dress still doesn't fit- but getting a new one with Christmas money.
Spiritual Goals:
As part of the daily routine, Stephanie will participate in gospel study at least 6 days per week for at least 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Upon planning out the month, Stephanie will attend the temple at least once per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Personal Fulfillment:
Having a full time job is difficult. Being a full time mom is difficult. For some crazy reason I do both, at the same time. Sometimes between the working and the taking care of the baby and pretending like I cook and do dishes it's hard to make sure that I take time to do things for myself. Currently I am looking around at the insanely messy apartment and just letting it go so I can finish this blog post because I intended to have it finished yesterday. I was going to make goals about having dishes done or keeping the house clean but decided that I need to focus on making sure I am taking care of myself first, and then I'll probably have more time and energy to take care of the house anyway. In my exhaustion at the end of the day, when I do have some free time, especially while I'm nursing the baby, I turn to the easiest thing to do- Facebook. Now let me make it clear that I am not anti-Facebook, clearly as you most likely found the link to my blog on Facebook. Facebook can be fun, enlightening, and relaxing. However, extended time on Facebook tends to become boring, idle, and frequently aggravating. Later I think about things I wish I had done but didn't because I got sucked into the never ending hole that is Facebook. I currently spend over an hour a day scrolling through the newsfeed. I am going to separate out reading news articles, blogs, etc that Facebook leads me to. I'm also really bad at writing in a journal. Perhaps future generations will read our Facebook posts as our journals??? But I don't post a lot of personal thoughts on Facebook for various reasons- it's not something I want to share with the world at large, or I'm worried about what type of debates it might start in the comments. My little brother bought me a beautiful planner/ journal combo for Christmas that has weekly prompts to guide journal writing. It would be very tragic if it did not get used.
Personal Goals:
Given options for down time, Stephanie will average no more than 45 minutes per day on Facebook over the course of a week for 3/4 weeks a month as tracked by a Facebook log sheet in Excel over a 3 month period with data transferred to the goal calendar weekly.
Given her planner/ journal combo, Stephanie will journal at least weekly for 3/4 weeks per month over a 3 month period as measured by the goal calendar.
Reward Schedule!
Typically a reward schedule isn't necessarily set out in an IEP, but it is an important principal that there are rewards for correct responses and good behavior. Positive reinforcement! We do the things we do because we get something we want from it. I.E.- I eat too much dessert because I get the instant gratification of the flavor and texture of the food. I Facebook because it lets my brain stop working for a while. A student might throw a tantrum because it gets them out of work or gives them access to something they want. The reward needs to be motivating enough to get passed the "natural man" rewards of what you are doing right now. So I am going to be setting myself a nice reward each month if I meet my goals. This month's reward will be a shopping trip with my Christmas gift cards.
I'll be checking in weekly to see how I am doing with my goals. At the end of the month I will determine if my goals were met and if I get my reward then set a new reward for the next month. At the end of the 3 months I will determine if the goals have been mastered and write new goals, continue goals, or tweak the goals.
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